For about a week now, I've been meaning to write about how a simple conversation with a stranger set me on a path of publishing books. 

After a long season of postpartum depression, I made myself join a book club. I knew for me to heal, I needed to be around people. 

I started my life anew, hunkered down with my kids, and didn’t have any close friends nearby, so I was simmering in my own cycle of self-pity.

I’ve spent 5 years being a stay-at-home mom, and I’m just now settling into this version of myself. I’ve been riddled with overwhelming emotions over losing the pre-child version of me, while also being filled with so much gratitude over growing my family. It’s such a conflicting feeling. For a bit, I felt so enlightened and joyous about being a mother. But when the dust settled, I noticed there was sorrow. 

I was listening to this humorous romantasy novel, I Accidentally Hired a Shadow Walker by Jessica Cage, that I had a come-to-Jesus moment with myself about my lack of self-care. In this book, the main character, Jericha Brown, is a boss with a capital B. She runs a successful business in a male-dominated, competitive industry, and she not only finds time to soak in her tub regularly but also rolls around in her garden daily. I mean, she’s just a whimsical bad bitch all around.

So, I said to myself:

You know what, I’m a whimsical bad bitch, too. So why the hell am I not soaking in my tub and rolling in my garden every day? Get it together, girl!

The most humbling moment for me was realizing I was broken and had been broken for a long time. I had just been masking through life, unintentionally hurting those around me because I was unhealed and traumatized.